Hello Cam,

I understand your predicament, as I have been in more than one such situation concerning a friend or loved one. It is very difficult when you are sympathizing and feeling someone’s pain, yet seemingly unable to be of any comfort. My advice is this:

Be a Good Listener
Ask your friend what’s wrong, and really listen to the answer. Let her vent her fears, frustrations and feelings. Maintain eye contact and show her that you’re interested in what she has to say. Resist the urge to give advice at this point, and just let her get it all out. Ask her to expand on these feelings and fears and let her know that you are hearing her. She will appreciate the focused attention, and this will help her feel genuinely cared for and understood. This will provide a good emotional release and make her feel better. (See also Become a Better Listener)

Tell Her Not To Worry
Much easier said than done, I know, but this can be very helpful. Ask her what the “worst case scenario” would be, then show her the Magic Formula for Worry:

a. Ask yourself, “What is the worst thing that can possibly happen if I can’t solve my problems?”
b. Prepare yourself mentally to accept the worst-if necessary.
c. Then calmly try to improve upon the worst-which you have already mentally agreed to accept.

Sometimes, how we react to things in our mind is more important than the “things” themselves.

(See also Don’t Worry, Be Happy)

Motivate Her
Tell her about the positive changes in your life. A lot of encouragement and motivation can be gained from the experiences of a close friend. You say are living proof of the Law of Attraction at work. Explain to your friend, in detail, the changes that have taken place in your life. Does she believe in the Law of Attraction? The Laws of the Universe? For many people, their dire circumstances have taken a dramatic and rapid change for the better when applying the Law of Attraction. All it takes is an understanding of the Law and the faith of a mustard seed. (See also Law of Attraction)

Ask for Divine Help
When it seems as though all is lost, turn to a “Higher Intelligence” and ask for direction and guidance. Understanding that you are made in the image of the Creator of the Universe, and are a living part of eternal spirit, will transform your life. A tenet of Alcohol Anonymous is to “Let go and let God” as you allow the Spirit to assist you. When you ask for Divine guidance, you will experience synchronicity as people and events suddenly turn up in your life.

A person’s particular religion doesn’t matter so much, as long as they believe in a Higher Power, Infinite Intelligence, or God. It is the realization that we are spiritual beings no matter what road is taken to get there.

Each of us is spiritually equipped to overcome and triumph over all the difficulties in our life. We are children of God and made in His likeness. We were made for success, not failure. We have but to ask and believe, and it shall be done.

And all things, whatever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive. Matthew 21:22

Using Affirmations of Faith
Affirm, “God is supplying all my needs. He that is within me is greater than he that is in the world and no weapon formed up against me shall prosper.”

Thou shalt decree a thing, and it shall be established unto thee; and the light shall shine upon thy ways Job 22:28

When you use affirmations of faith, all the forces of the universe will come to your aid.

Explain the Law of Gratitude
Sometimes we have to remind ourselves what we have to be grateful for. There is a Law of Gratitude and to conform to this law is to amass wealth, health, peace and joy in your life. This law is the natural principal of action and reaction. It simply means that whatever you impress on your subconscious mind will be expressed.

The grateful attitude of your mind for all the good that you share, becomes a conviction in your deeper mind. This leads to a grateful heart and a grateful heart attracts spiritual and material wealth. Gratitude brings about a transformation in our mind and heart and becomes a spiritual and mental magnet, drawing toward us all our desires from countless sources. (See also Law of Gratitude)

You must count your blessings–not your troubles!

A Word on Enabling
A parents’ love for their child(ren) is a very powerful thing, and we must be careful when venturing in to the arena of giving advice on this subject.

I am speaking from first hand experience when I talk about enabling a child. I too have been in this situation with my own son for 2 years.

The young man who receives help too easily and too frequently finds it easier to take the handouts than to make his own way. Of course, you should always be ready to help your child, or any one else who is truly in need, but not to the point of making a parasite out of them.

He that will not work, neither shall he eat. Derived from II Thessalonian 3:10

We can’t make excuses for a child or young adult so we can justify enabling them. The parent continually enabling the child is doing the wrong thing and preventing the child from developing and maturing in responsibility.

This calls for “Tough Love” and a difficult situation for many parents. Because of your love for your child, you must stop enabling. You must resist helping someone who won’t help themselves. Teach your child how to become self-reliant and responsible. Better yet, teach them how to find the riches in life. Teach him that true wealth is in the creative power of his own mind.

Please feel free to download the Free E-Books and articles from this site for , and learning the .

Gina

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